Daughter of Troops

I thought about calling this "things I have learned from my dog."  I'm referencing the way she (Maggie) loves to dig holes. When she digs she is in a fury, slinging dirt everywhere. She recently decided to dig a hole right next to my flower bed that is teaming with beautiful purple Wondering Jew. Much of it became covered in the dirt hiding it beauty and causing it to be weighed down. I realized how much this reflects my life's current state. I started out just kicking a little dirt around aka allowing things and people back into my life that had formally been shut out. It was fun, fresh and I felt in control, but the more dirt I moved the more it resembled a hole. The dirt began to pile up on things I once held dear. Most notable was my authentic self. Once the hole was deep enough I could see where I was losing my freedom.  The dirt had weighed be down and caused me to bend low in order to sustain the weight (burdens) now piled on me. My once bright light was now be

AWAKE A few weeks ago I traveled out of town. Just a three hour drive but long stretches of highway and sometimes being the only vehicle on the road. At times a vehicle would speed past me and shake me from my lull for a moment.  There is a phrase I heard recently called “highway hypnosis”.  Here is the Wikipedia definition: Highway hypnosis , also known as white line fever, is a mental state in which a person can drive a truck or other automobile great distances, responding to external events in the expected, safe and correct manner with no recollection of having consciously done so.    I realize I have at times lived my life this way.  Just going through the motions, doing what is expected of me without any conscious awareness of what it is doing to me.  I can “drive” for hundreds of miles (weeks, months, years) mesmerized by the white lines. I’ve often said referring to certain routes, “I have traveled this route so many times I could drive it blindfolded”.  And so, I have d